Suddenly, I'm really bad at updating this blog.

It's crazy how your life can seemingly change overnight. In my case, it's not necessarily a bad change, but it does mean that I have far less freedom, and less energy, on a daily basis. Writing is something that I have to actively plan, rather than being able to do it spontaneously like only a few weeks ago.

Time is so strange. At the beginning of last month, I had trouble remembering what day of the week it was. Now, I'm hyperaware of the fact that it's Sunday night, because it sets off another week of work that will be good and productive, but drain me by the end of it.

Our experience of time is directly related to our sense of place within it, and I find that fascinating. This time last year, I didn't really feel like I was part of the world, so the time that our world runs on seemed to affect me far less than it does now.

It occurs to me that life is really happening now, and I have the leading role in my own story. Regardless of the revolving cast of characters around me, one character stays the same. One character is on screen for the whole run of the show, throughout all seasons, even through the plot twists and cliffhangers and filler episodes.

And the wildest part? There's no pause button, even when it feels like there's nothing happening.

There are so many Sunday nights that I haven't appreciated for what they symbolize since high school. I'll be looking at them far differently from now on.

Until next time (hopefully soon), keep breathing.

-D.

Follow my blog for more of my thoughts on basically everything, and follow me on Instagram @denaeculp.writer and Twitter @denaeculpwriter for more poetry, quotes, and pseudo-inspiring randomness.

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